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BNI (Business Network International) plans to open its first Brunchtime Chapter in Sydney next month.

To be known as BNI Brunch n Referrals, the Chapter will hold its first Information Meeting for interested members at Canada Bay Club in Five Dock on Wednesday 17^th February at 11am.

BNI’s Executive Director for Sydney Inner West, Tony Benner, said that the new chapter was being formed to cater for business people who are busy sending their children off to school at a time when other BNI chapters usually meet.

“The new brunchtime chapter is also for people who simply cannot function at 7am – we are not all morning people,” he added.

BNI is an international word-of-mouth referral organisation with chapters throughout Australia and 43 other countries.  

A BNI chapter provides professionals in a variety of occupations a weekly opportunity to meet with each other and pass qualified referrals.  At each meeting, members briefly introduce their businesses and share the types of referrals they would like to receive.

“Because only one person from each business category is allowed in each chapter, a person can "lock out" competitors by quickly joining a new BNI chapter.”

Anyone interested in finding out more about BNI or attending the Five Dock meeting on 15^th March can reach Tony Benner on 9279 0261 or 0407 366 140.

To mark International Networking Week for 2010, BNI Sydney Inner West has arranged a breakfast presentation on “Fishing for Business.”

The presentation, to be held at Dolcissimo Ristorante in Haberfield (Sydney) on Friday 5^th February at 7:15am, will demonstrate how to build businesses by applying fishing techniques to networking activities.

Using the right bait to hook more clients whilst tackling your database are just a few of the subjects to be covered in this innovative presentation

BNI’s Sydney Inner West Executive Director, Tony Benner, said "The goal of International Networking Week is to recognise and celebrate the role that networking plays in the development and success of businesses around the world."

"Between 1-5 February, business people in Australia, USA, Canada, Europe, India, SE Asia and dozens of other countries will be invited to luncheons and/or breakfasts to hear speakers discuss the benefits of networking in today’s business environment.”

He said the focus of these events will be to bring together representatives of government, businesses and the community to network with each other, to understand the concept of good networking and to listen to talks by key networking specialists from across the world. These speakers will offer advice and information on how businesses can grow and succeed through good networking practices.

“The purpose of International Networking Week is to raise the profile of networking in the wider community, recognising it as an essential tool for success in today’s business climate.”

For further information or comment, please contact Tony Benner,

Executive Director, BNI Sydney Inner West, Tel. +612 9279 0261 or 0407 366 140.

http://events.constantcontact.com/register/event?oeidk=a07e2o23zthaf36d2a0&oseq=

By Richard Poi, Area Director, BNI Sydney Inner West, AUSTRALIA

Good review s and favourable comments are continuously being received about James Cameron’s latest blockbuster film, “AVATAR”.

Amidst all the action and the superb special effects wizardry, AVATAR has a subtle message.  It is a message that we can all relate to: relationships, communities, understanding and building strong networking links.

There are several lessons we can learn from Jake Sully’s interaction with the Na’vi people and apply them to our behaviour in our networking environment or when crossing environments that are socially or culturally different from ours.

Like Jake, it is quite often that we get thrown into situations where we have to find our way – especially with people in different social and business circumstances.  We need to learn and communicate, and in doing so, build our relationships to earn credibility and trust.  By establishing a firm status, then we gain acceptance as a worthy long term business partner.  Jake did this by learning the Na’vi language and their indigenous activities like archery and riding the amazing Banshees where teamwork is the utmost ingredient to success.  In our world, we sometimes indulge in our prospect’s recreational interest by playing golf to build rapport culminating in a business deal.

In AVATAR, much emphasis is placed on “linking” and communicating, e.g. Na’vi using the tip of their pigtails to connect with the flora and fauna of the forest and telepathy in some special instances.  In most cases, there are elements of mindfulness and respect to living beings in an eco system on the moon Pandora. 

We do the same when we network.  We are always mindful of what the other person’s expectations of us are and how we should react so as to gain mutual acceptance.  Jake’s “communicating” with the Banshees, the Mother Goddess Eywa, and the Sacred Tree of Voices are notable examples.  In our one-to-one meetings, we engage in a two-way communication by attentive listening and sharing.  We may not have telepathic powers but we can study body language and close business deals at the right time.  We may not have the Na’vi pigtails to tap on responses but BNI tells me regularly: you have two ears and a mouth, so use them proportionately.

Relationships built on a strong foundation create extensions to outer tiers of relationships, like growing vines, spreading and reaching out to form a massive network that serves to achieve a common cause.  Feel that surge of excitement as we cheer and jeer as Jake rallies support from neighbouring clans to fight the Sky People!  When we network, we need to find that commonality of interest from which grows a lasting strategic alliance to realise our networking and business goals. To be successful, we must collaborate.

Isn’t AVATAR a great movie, as it inspires us to network more intelligently and strategically when we next hit the arena?

"Networking is the kind of social and professional interaction that came naturally to businesspeople throughout most of this nation’s history, especially in smaller communities. But as villages grew into towns, towns into cities and cities into megalopolises, the sense of community and the close, personal business relationships that went with it gradually disappeared. The rise of large retail chains and multinational corporations, along with the demise of small businesses under the stiff price competition from these giants, further weakened the natural networking that existed.

The disappearance of community-based networking has left a vacuum that is now being filled by strong-contact networks. Business networking organizations such as BNI create a virtual main street for business professionals–an environment and a system for passing referrals that is the 21st-century equivalent of the traditional model for doing business.

As Eric Lesser, in his book Knowledge and Social Capital, notes, “Without a shared understanding of common terms, activities and outcomes, it becomes very difficult to reap the benefits associated with building social capital.” The power of business networking organizations is that they provide these common terms, activities and outcomes in a system that is designed specifically to accomplish this goal.

When you join and attend meetings in a business networking group, you build social capital in a number of ways. You gain the trust and friendship of fellow members; you provide valuable referrals; you contribute knowledge and skills to the effort; you become more knowledgeable and improve your social and business skills. Not least, you get out of your cave–the self-imposed isolation that many business people fall prey to.

Like financial capital, social capital is not only earned and accumulated, it can be spent. The international networking organization BNI has Givers Gain as its guiding principle: The good you do comes back to you over the long term and often in indirect ways. You accumulate social capital by providing help, advice, information, referrals and other benefits to your fellow networkers, with no thought of a quid pro quo. By gaining the trust of others, gratitude for value provided and a solid reputation for integrity and expertise, you become a person whom others wish to help whenever an opportunity to do so presents itself.

A colleague of mine worked for several years with a financial advisor who was a very passionate networker. In fact, he founded a chapter of an international networking organization and became very active as the president of the chapter. He gave more referrals than anyone else in the chapter; however, he got very few referrals back in return.

He came to my colleague a little frustrated about this. My colleague told him it takes time to build trust, especially in the financial services industry. He recommended several books on the subject and suggested that the advisor attend some training programs my colleague was offering. The financial advisor’s reply was a complete surprise. He said, “Train me to train the programs.”

My colleague said, “Aren’t you concerned that you’re already giving a lot more that you’re getting?”

He said, “Yes, but I know that trust takes time, and giving people valuable training at my expense will build trust.”

He became my colleague’s lead trainer and assistant director in Winston-Salem, N. C., and continued to give even more of his time and energy than he ever had before–even though he had been very active in his previous leadership role. His network rewarded him in an amazing way. Over the next 24 months, he received referrals worth $36 million–proving once more that givers always gain in the end."

The holiday party is a great time to meet people but . . . you should have a plan!

Everybody goes to parties, and the holiday season is full of them. It’s also a business slowdown season for many of us who are not in retail. The holiday parties are NOT just a place for free food and drinks.

Holiday parties and other social mixers bring new opportunities to network, even more than the rest of the year.   The holidays are times when we are more likely to see people in a social setting, and this setting definitely lends itself to building relationships.

Most people think of networking only in traditional networking venues, such as the chamber, strong-contact referral groups like BNI, and other business-oriented gatherings. But that’s not using the power of networking to its fullest.

It can be the best time to introduce yourself or have a friendly conversation with one of your superiors. Making an impact on someone important can be a real career booster; it could open the door for new job opportunities, promotions and/or new business.

In order to make the most of “holiday party networking,” here are a few things to keep in mind:

• Be prepared! If you’re going to hobnob, try to know whom you are talking to, what their job and role in the company are and what they’ve done this year for the organization.  Use this info as a way to start a conversation. If you know some of the people who will be in attendance, do a Google search on them.  Do some homework.
• Ask questions. Some suggestions: How did you start the business? How did you take the business international?  How did you start franchising? What were some of the challenges with . . . ? Have you read any good books lately? (My favorite is: How can I help you?)
• Have a “teaser” topic ready. Approaching the end of the year, every business wants to increase profits and performance in the New Year. Have an idea ready that describes how you can improve your sector in the coming year. (Word to the wise: Don’t give away the goose; set up a meeting to discuss the details.)
• Use this introduction as a segue for a future meeting. As mentioned above, you don’t want to “end” the conversation at the party. The end game here is to open the door for follow-up. You want to be able to connect with the person after the party, one-to-one.
• Don’t have more than a couple drinks. It’s a party, but it’s not YOUR party. You don’t want to be stinking of liquor when you approach the people you want to connect with. Impressions count. Make the right one.
• Be confident of your value. Introducing yourself to an executive can be an intimidating experience, so give yourself an informed pep talk. Before the event, make a list of the things you’ve done over the past year and understand how what you do may integrate into discussions. Once you’ve got this down, there’s no reason you shouldn’t feel good about yourself. Consider how what you’ve done can integrate with the executive’s interests.
• Honour the event. Make sure when networking at a holiday party–or any non-traditional networking event–that networking is supplementary to the reason people are there, so don’t treat it like a chamber mixer.  Be sincere.

Don’t act as if you’re in the boardroom giving a presentation; keep it natural and leave them intrigued. The real emphasis must be on “finesse” at a company holiday party. Yes, it is a great networking opportunity–but if you overtly “sell,” you may turn people off! After all, it is a holiday.

You can network anywhere, including events where it might not at first occur to you to try it–and, paradoxically, it’s at these non-traditional networking settings where you’ll often get the most bang for your buck.

Small business, by sticking together and helping one another, can beat the doom and gloom. 

In times of doom and gloom, it is refreshing to hear of organisations flourishing - which is the case with chapters of BNI (Business Network International), the world’s largest business referral organisation.

BNI , which has been around for 13 years in Australia, not only lets others know about your business, it transforms your outlook on your personal and business skills. Membership helps you to discover your true potential, become more outgoing and positive, develops your presentational and networking skills, and boosts your confidence.

"BNI follows a proven formula that succeeds all around the world, and is definitely worth a look.  Come and join us for breakfast and see what you think," said Tony Benner, Executive Director for BNI Sydney Inner West.

“Currently, we are receiving an increased number of inquiries about joining a structured networking group as Sydney business people review their promotional strategies.”

"BNI works for thousands of business people, from all fields - banking, accountancy, law, retail and the construction industry." BNI’s newest chapter meets every Tuesday morning at Dolsissimo Restaurant in Haberfield, starting at 7:30am and concluding business by 9:00am.  

Organised by a supportive membership committee and dedicated leadership team bringing fun and humour to business, meetings for the members are efficient, active and friendly. During the meeting, each chapter member is allocated 60 seconds to promote their business and needs in a clear and concise presentation, with a 10-minute opportunity given twice yearly.

Similar meetings are held for other BNI chapters, three meeting in Concord, plus another in Haberfield and one at Rhodes Shopping Centre.Chapter members are also encouraged to take the opportunity to learn more about each other, and their businesses, in a one-hour, one-to-one meeting, where goals, accomplishments, interests, skills and other networks can be discussed in more depth. "This increases understanding of what each party needs and helps build relationships.” 

For further information, please call Tony Benner on (02) 9279 0261.

International Networking Week™, an initiative of BNI, will be celebrated in Concord with a Mega Networking Breakfast on Tuesday 3rd February at Roman’s Restaurant. 

It will be addressed by some of Sydney’s leading networkers who will talk about their networking experiences.  They will include The Hon Patricia Forsythe (Sydney Chamber of Commerce), David Baumgarten (Business Enterprise Centres), Candy Tymson (Author and public speaker) and Flying Solo’s Robert Gerrish.  Over 100 people are expected to attend. 

Executive Director of BNI Sydney Inner West, Tony Benner, said the purpose of International Networking Week™ is to raise the profile of networking in the wider community, recognising it as an essential tool for success in today’s business climate; and the goal of International Networking Week™ is to recognise and celebrate the key role that networking plays in the development and success of businesses in every part of the world. 

“Business people throughout Australia, USA, Canada, Europe, India, SE Asia and dozens of other countries have been invited to luncheons and/or breakfasts to hear speakers discuss the benefits of networking in today’s business environment.” 

During 2008 over $70 million worth of qualified referrals had been passed by members of BNI in Australia, demonstrating the power of networking and word of mouth marketing.  

Major networking events are being held in most capital cities in Australia, with chapters in all parts of Australia undertaking their own celebrations, including inviting members of Chambers of Commerce to some of their events. 

International Networking Week, an initiative of BNI, will be held during the week commencing 2nd February, 2009. 

In Sydney, a Mega Networking Breakfast will be held on Tuesday 3rd February at Roman’s Restaurant in Concord.  It will be addressed by some of Sydney’s leading networkers who will talk about their networking experiences. 

Executive Director of BNI Sydney Inner West, Tony Benner, said the goal of International Networking Week is to recognise and celebrate the key role that networking plays in the development and success of businesses in every part of the world.  

"Business people in Australia, USA, Canada, Europe, India, SE Asia and dozens of other countries will be invited to luncheons and/or breakfasts to hear speakers discuss the benefits of networking in today’s business environment.” 

He said the focus of these events will be to bring together representatives of government, businesses and the community to network with each other, to understand the concept of good networking and to listen to talks by key networking specialists from across the world. These speakers will offer advice and information on how businesses can grow and succeed through good networking practices. 

“Invitations to attend are open to the wider business community, members of other networking organisations, students, press representatives and interested parties from all levels of government and business.”  

“The purpose of International Networking Week is to raise the profile of networking in the wider community, recognising it as an essential tool for success particularly in today’s business climate.”  

For further information or comment, please contact Tony Benner,BNI Sydney Inner West, Tel. 9279 0261 or 0407 366 140. tony.benner@bni.com.au

In these times of doom and gloom, it is refreshing to hear of organisations flourishing - which is the case with chapters of BNI (Business Network International) in Sydney’s Inner West.

BNI networking, which has been around for 12 years in Australia, not only lets others know about your business, it transforms your outlook on your personal and business skills. Membership helps you to discover your true potential, become more outgoing and positive, develops your presentational and networking skills, and boosts your confidence.

"BNI follows a proven formula that succeeds all around the world, and is definitely worth a look.  Come and join us for breakfast and see what you think," said Tony Benner, Executive Director for BNI Sydney Inner West.“

Currently, we are receiving an increased number of inquiries about joining a structured networking group as business people review their promotional strategies.”

"BNI works for thousands of business people, from all fields - banking, accountancy, law, retail and the construction industry."

Held every Tuesday morning at Roman’s Café Restaurant in Concord, the Tiger City Chapter meetings start at 7:30am and conclude business by 9:00am. Organised by a supportive membership committee and dedicated leadership team, bringing fun and humour to business, meetings for the 25 members are vibrant, efficient, active and friendly.  

During the meeting, each chapter member is allocated 60 seconds to promote their business and needs, in a clear and concise presentation, with a 10-minute opportunity given twice yearly.

Similar meetings are held for the other two BNI chapters meeting in Concord, plus one in Haberfield and the other at Rhodes Shopping Centre.

Chapter members are also encouraged to take the opportunity to learn more about each other, and their businesses, in a one-hour, one-to-one meeting, where goals, accomplishments, interests, skills and other networks or group memberships can be discussed in more depth.

"This increases understanding of what each party needs and helps build relationships.” 

To register your interest in visiting a meeting, please call Tony Benner on 612 9279 0261.

 “Word of  Mouth” marketing continues to grow in popularity says Tony Benner, Executive Director of BNI Sydney Inner West, the world’s largest business referral organisation.  

“Concord has now become the centre of networking with three of BNI’s chapters now holding their weekly breakfast meetings at the new Romans Café Restaurant in Majors Bay Road,” he said.  “Other BNI chapters meet in Rhodes and Haberfield.”

Mr Benner said that BNI is unique in that it only allows one person from each trade or profession to join a chapter, which means your competitors cannot join and any conflict in passing referrals is avoided.“Just imagine having 25 additional people on your sales force. 

That’s what membership of a BNI group means – every chapter member carries your business card in a special wallet and is constantly seeking opportunities for fellow members,” said Mr Benner.

He said BNI’s philosophy is "Givers Gain". That is, if I give you referrals, you will give me referrals and we will do better as a result. “Our aim is to teach business professionals that the word of mouth process is more about farming than it is about hunting: it's about the cultivation of professional relationships for the mutual benefit of all, particularly during these challenging economic times.”

He added that success in a BNI group is in the hands of each member.   They can get as much out of it as they put in.  The added bonus is the group of motivated people encouraging individual members to achieve greater things, both personally and in business.

Further information available from Tony Benner,Executive Director, BNI Sydney Inner West, Tel (02) 9279 0261. 

* by Dr Ivan Misner & Tony Benner 

Q: What can I do to build my business in a recessionary economy? 

Successful business owners learn from the past. So, what did we learn from previous economic downturns?  

In the early '90s, right in the middle of a nasty recession, I was at a business mixer where I was meeting many local business professionals. It seemed that everyone was feeling the crunch from the slow economy. Throughout the entire event, the favorite topic of discussion was how bad the economy was and how things were getting worse.

The whole affair was depressing, because nearly everyone was obsessed with the problems of the economy and its impact on their businesses. Except one real estate agent! 

I asked him how he could be doing so well, given the conditions of the economy and the stiff competition. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a blue-and-white badge that read: "I Absolutely Refuse to Participate in the Recession!" "

While most of my competitors are crying how bad business is, I'm out drumming up a ton of business networking with my contacts and generating referrals by talking about the great opportunity that exists right now to purchase real estate." If you want to do well in business, you must understand that it does absolutely no good to complain to people about tough things are.

When you complain about how bad business is, half the people you tell don't care, and the other half are glad that you're worse off than they are! While you cannot control the economy or your competition, you can control your response to the economy.

Referrals can keep your business alive and well during an economic downturn. During the last recession, thousands of business owners grew and prospered. They were successful because they consciously made the decision to refuse to participate in the recession. They did so by developing their networking skills and learning how to build their business through word-of-mouth.  You can do the same during a slow economy by: 

Diversifying your networks. You need breadth and depth. Participate in different kinds of groups.

Refusing to be a "cave-dweller." Be visible. Get out there and meet people at business events.

Learning how to work the meetings you attend. It's not called "net-sit" or "net-eat," it's called "network." Learn networking systems and techniques that apply to the different kinds of organizations you attend.

Being prepared. Prepare effective introductions and presentations to give to other business professionals at networking events and meetings.

Developing your contact spheres. These are a groups of business professionals who have a symbiotic or compatible, noncompetitive relationship with you.

Knowing your goal. Perhaps most important, understand that networking is more about farming than it is about hunting. It's about building relationships with other businesspeople.

Don't let a bad economy be your excuse for failure. Instead, make it your opportunity to succeed.

It's not what you know or who you know, it's how well you know people that counts. In a tough economy, it's your social capital that has value. Make good use of it, and you'll thrive while others struggle.

* Dr. Ivan Misner is the Founder and Chairman of BNI, the world's largest business networking organisation and Tony Benner is BNI’s Executive Director for Sydney Inner West.  www.bnisydneyinnerwest.com.au

Ten Commandments for Better Networking

*by Ivan Misner and Tony Benner

Do you suffer from butterflies in the tummy at the very mention of networking at business functions?  If you answered yes, you are not alone!  Many business people and entrepreneurs get a bit uncomfortable when it comes right down to walking up to someone and starting a conversation.  Many others are concerned about getting effective results from the time they spend networking.  The process doesn’t have to be traumatic, scary, or a waste of time.  When done properly, it can truly make a difference in the amount of business your company generates. With the right approach, you can use it to build a wealth of resources and contacts that will help to make your business very successful. Use the following Ten Commandments to help you network your way through your next business networking event: 

1.   Have the tools to network with you at all times.These include an informative name badge, business cards, brochures about your business, and a pocket-sized business card file containing cards of other professionals whom you can refer. 

2.  Set a goal for the number of people you’ll meet. 

Identify a reachable goal based on attendance and the type of group.  If you feel inspired, set a goal to meet fifteen to twenty people and make sure you get all their cards.  If you don’t feel so hot, go for less.  In either case, don’t leave until you’ve met your goal.

 3.  Act like a host, not a guest. A host is expected to do things for others, while a guest sits back and relaxes.  Volunteer to help greet people.  If you see visitors sitting, introduce yourself and ask if they would like to meet others. Act as a conduit.  

4.  Listen and ask questions.  Remember that a good networker has two ears and one mouth and uses them proportionately.  After you’ve learned what another person does, tell them what you do.  Be specific, but brief.  Don’t assume they know your business. 

 5.  Don’t try to close a deal.  These events are not meant to be a vehicle to hit on business people to buy your products or services.  Networking is about developing relationships with other professionals.  Meeting people at events should be the beginning of that process, not the end of it. 

6.  Give referrals whenever possible.  The best networkers believe in the givers gain philosophy (what goes around, comes around).  If I help you, you’ll help me and we’ll both do better as a result of it.  In other words, if you don’t genuinely attempt to help the people you meet, then you are not networking effectively.  If you can’t give someone a bona fide referral, try to offer some information that might be of interest to them (such as details about an upcoming event).

8.  Manage your time efficiently.  Spend ten minutes or less with each person you meet and don’t linger with friends or associates.  If your goal is to meet a given number of people, be careful not to spend too much time with any one person.  When you meet someone interesting with whom you’d like to speak further, set up an appointment for a later date.  

9.  Write notes on the backs of business cards you collect.  Record anything you think may be useful in remembering each person more clearly.  This will come in handy when you follow up on each contact.

10.  Follow up!  You can obey the previous nine commandments religiously, but if you don’t follow up effectively, you will have wasted your time.  Drop a note or give a call to each person you’ve met.  Be sure to fulfill any promises you’ve made. 

* Dr. Ivan Misner is the Founder and Chairman of BNI, the world's largest business networking organisation and Tony Benner is BNI’s Executive Director for Sydney Inner West.  www.bnisydneyinnerwest.com.au

by Tony Benner, BNI Sydney Inner West* 

Let’s look at your business card.   Can you clearly read your own email address? 

With over half the world’s population experiencing less than perfect eyesight it is essential that business people should make themselves easily accessible.  After all, if someone wants to do business with you, it would be nice to hear from that person. 

Alas, many graphic designers and printers have developed the habit of making the email address so small it becomes difficult to read. 

Sometimes a card is designed with so-called trendy colours and backgrounds, making the key information impossible to read for the normal person. 

The time has arrived to let your printer or graphic designer know just who is the boss.  If they cannot design a business card that clearly shows your key contact details, then perhaps it’s time to change designer or printer. The Internet, and email in particular, has become the primary method of communication in our rapidly moving world.  However, the Internet is very unforgiving.  It only takes one incorrect keystroke for a vital message to be lost.    

Yet, for some reason, so many business cards have the email addresses printed in such a small or indistinct font that the only method of reading them is with the aid of a magnifying glass. So next time you have your business cards printed, be very firm with the graphic designer or printer.  Tell them that you must have your email address printed in such a size and with a clear background so that your clients and future customers can easily communicate with you.   

Some will argue with you about design principles and colour coordination.  Be tough, and remind them that the purpose of your card is to allow people to successfully communicate with you and it is vital that this process is facilitated.   After all, you are paying the bill and it is your business that will suffer if people have difficulty in making contact with you. 

* Tony Benner is Executive Director, BNI Sydney Inner West, and runs public relations consultancy, Corporate Focus PR.

www.corpfocus.com.au   

Tel. (612) 9279 0261   tonyb@bni.com.au

Are Women Better Networkers than Men?

by Candy Tymson*

A summary of an address to celebrate the inaugural International Networking Day on 6th February 2007, organised by BNI Sydney Inner West.

The way of doing business has changed dramatically in the past ten years. No longer are we operating in a predominately male workspace, using the traditional male style of direct communication. So what impact has the influx of women had on using networking to build business, and are they doing it better than their male colleagues?

In doing the research for my book “Gender Games: Doing Business With the Opposite Sex”, the key  difference as to how the genders use language to communicate was that men typically focus on information, while women typically focus on relationship.

The most popular tool for measuring individual style and preferences, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, distinguishes between ‘thinking’ and ‘feeling’ styles of making decisions and communicating with others.  Not surprisingly, two-thirds of all men who complete the profile score highly as ‘thinkers’; while two thirds of the women rate highest as ‘feelers’.

Well-known linguist and pioneer of male/female communication style differences,  Deborah Tannen,  proposes that generally speaking men use language to preserve their independence and maintain their position in the group; while women use language to create connection and intimacy.

There seems to be a theme here!  And yes, we are generalising, there are always exceptions to the rule.

Let’s be a fly on the wall at a typical networking event.  What would you observe as the differences in behaviour as you move from group to group?

An all-male group is likely to be talking business or sport, with most members of the group competing with each other to demonstrate their status and knowledge.  It is rare for any personal information to be exchanged, or vulnerability shown.

In contrast, an all-female group is likely to be having quite a personal conversation. While they may also be talking business it will be from the perspective of sharing information, offering assistance and showing their vulnerability by talking about mistakes they have made so that the others can benefit from their experience.

And a mixed group?  Well it depends on the occasion, the status of the individuals and even the venue.

One of the key elements in the way that networking has changed is that it is now seen more as a method to create ‘strategic alliances’ rather than as a means of  ‘selling’ your products for services.

So which communication style would be the most effective in developing operational and personal networks, and creating strategic alliances? That’s where the conundrum occurs!

Research clearly shows that business today is about relationship, making and maintaining contacts – and women, who are predominately relationship focused, are naturally exceptional at that.  So when it comes to building good networks in their operational and personal spheres, women are usually stronger than men. However, men seem stronger when it comes to using contacts and connections to build strategic alliances and ask for the business.

When I surveyed 1,200 businesswomen on what they felt was the major thing holding them back in business today – 38% said “lack of self promotion”.  Research consistently confirms that men        generally are far more confident than women in promoting their abilities – they tend to oversell     themselves, while women tend to undersell themselves.

So could it be argued that women tend to shine in the forms of networking where building relationships and making connections are important, in the areas of operational and personal networking for example; while men still lead the charge on the networking that generates successful strategic       alliances?

That’s how I see it – what have you observed?

For information on her workshops, presentations and products:

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BNI is a professional business networking organisation that allows only one representative from each business or profession to join any of its chapters.